Episode 34: Dear Politicians Who Say “Thoughts and Prayers” and Then Do Absolutely Nothing

This is our letter to the Politicians Who Say “Thoughts and Prayers” and Then Do Absolutely Nothing. We hope that you find the comical satire in our letters and stay tuned for more letters to come.

Legal Disclaimer: The following letter is a work of satire and comedy. All names, events, and scenarios are fictionalized for humorous purposes and are not intended to be taken as factual statements. 

READ THE LETTER - EPISODE 34 - Dear Politicians Who Say “Thoughts and Prayers” and Then Do Absolutely Nothing

Dear Politicians Who Say “Thoughts and Prayers” and Then Do Absolutely Nothing,

 

Ah, yes, the holy incantation of legislative inertia.

 

Every time tragedy strikes, whether it’s another mass shooting, a climate catastrophe, a public health crisis, or a system-wide failure that disproportionately affects everyday people, there you are, standing solemnly at a podium, holding a press conference or tweeting in Times New Roman like you just discovered human emotion: “Our thoughts and prayers are with the victims and their families.”

 

It’s like watching someone spray perfume on a dumpster fire and call it disaster response.

 

Do you think your pious platitudes are currency? If you tweet them enough times, the pain of grieving families will vanish, the communities will rebuild themselves, and the root causes of suffering will politely take their leave.

 

You send prayers like they're certified mail, no return address, no follow-up.

 

Meanwhile, legislation that could actually do something. Shelved. Investigations? Stonewalled. Reform? Ghosted like an ex who asked for emotional maturity. It’s almost like your thoughts are with the donors, and your prayers are directed toward poll numbers.

 

Let’s be honest: at this point, “thoughts and prayers” is the political equivalent of hitting “snooze” on a national emergency.

 

We’re not asking for miracles. We’re asking for leadership. Accountability. Action. A pulse, perhaps?

But sure, keep lighting virtual candles while the rest of us are out here with fire extinguishers and bandages, doing your job.

 

Sincerely Savage,
A Nation That’s Fresh Out of Faith in You

 

Legal Disclaimer: The following letter is a work of satire and comedy. All names, events, and scenarios are fictionalized for humorous purposes and are not intended to be taken as factual statements.